1. Dressing extra nice for an interview and then telling your boss you had to leave in the middle of the day for a “doctor’s appointment.”Yeah, she knew.
2. Buying new underwear because you were too lazy to do your laundry. The cheap, scratchy kind that came in a pack of five from the drugstore and seemed to have been designed specifically to give you visible panty lines in everything you owned.
4. Buying something because you thought it would totally change your life. Unless a bag comes with a genie inside, the only thing it’s really changing is your bank balance.
5. Convincing yourself that you couldn’t wear the same fancy outfit more than once because people would recognize it and judge you. Who did you think you were? Beyoncé? No one was keeping tabs on your looks like that. And if they were, then they were either completely obsessed with you or had literally nothing interesting going on in their own lives. Besides, truly amazing outfits are hard to find. Better to wear the same pieces over and over again and look totally awesome than to waste a bunch of time and money on stuff that doesn’t look as good.
6. Throwing your favorite sweater in the washing machine or dryer because you were too cheap to take it to the dry cleaner. Why is it only the sweaters we love the most that actually shrink? (Apparently, you can un-shrink a sweater by soaking it in a sink full of gentle hair conditioner and lukewarm water, and then laying it out to dry on a thick towel.)
8. Buying pretty much the exact same thing over and over again. You would go to great lengths to rationalize it — “Oh, but this gold zipper totally changes the whole look!” — but eventually you came to realize that the real reason you kept buying slightly different versions of the same thing was that you weren’t really that into any of them. You were just anxious that the perfect version of whatever it was would never show up.
9. Letting your shopping choices be dictated by what other people thought was “right” for your body shape. All that does is stop you from trying new things and convince you that your body is some sort of problem that can be solved by shopping, which is seriously messed up.
10. Throwing away your favorite pair of boots because the sole wore out. It took you three years to find those boots, but you couldn’t give a cobbler three days to resole them.
11. Wearing clothes that were too small because you were afraid that wearing the next size up meant you were fat. Oh, the shame!